A Letter to Penny: An Attempt at Roomsharing

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Dear Penny,

We spent a warm and sunny week in Arizona and I was so impressed by you and Maisy sleeping so well even with all three of us girls in one room that I chose to keep the room-sharing going when we got home.  I loved the week we spent trekking up to Maisy’s room together, reading books in bed with you in my lap, and tucking you into your big girl bed and hearing you say “nigh night” as I left the room.  But after a week I realized the resulting sleep wasn’t good enough.  In your crib in your room you typically sleep all night long, from 7pm – 6:30am.  In our shared room experience you typically woke every 2 hours (settling yourself, but still, waking me) and then attempting to wake for the day at 5am.  I don’t understand the point of sacrificing any sleep when I know there’s a way that lends both of us a better night’s rest.  So, even though I’d love to have you share a room with your big sister one day, simply because I like the byproducts that come with it like respecting each others space and the closeness that comes with roommates, that day doesn’t have to be right now.

If there’s one thing I’ve learned the hard way it’s that it’s best to only choose the battles I have to.  Why fight this sleep fight when I know we can make it work for you to have your own room, even when the new baby arrives?  Then when you are old enough to hold to the same expectations we hold Maisy to we can try this room-sharing thing again.  One day you will be old enough to enter that wonderful toddler sleeps-like-a-rock-phase and you won’t be so easily woken by the sleep stirrings of your sister in the top bunk.  One day you will be old enough to expect you to stay in your room until 6:30 like your sister.  One day is not today and that is perfectly fine.  I was honestly sad to see your cute little self snuggled into a big girl bed anyways.  I was sad not to have you just across the hall in the nursery.  I’m not ready for you to grow out of being my baby and I guess you weren’t either.

Forever yours,

Mommy

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