-written April 2017

Sometimes I write to my girls and don’t hit “publish” right away. This post was written in April 2017 and this picture was taken in April 2017. Truth is, this was the only night I did this sleep routine with Penny. But, what I learned through this night of a new sleep tactic, is that giving myself (and her) a grace period of 5 – 15 minutes after laying her down to sleep was a great amount of time to give myself a reboot to either go back in and help her or for her to choose to peacefully give in to sleep on her own.

I’d love to hear from you other fellow moms what worked best for you and your baby to find sleep, and why. Comment below!

My sweet Penny,

Some nights ago I started a new method of “sleep training.” I’ve tried to be gentle and get you to sleep on your own without you crying about it. But after some souls searching and enough sleepless nights stacked up in a row I did some more research. Again. This is what I found.

Baby sleep training: The basics

And then this.

Baby sleep training: Cry it out methods

So last night I let you cry for 5 minutes, then 10, then 15, then 15 until over an hour had gone by and you were still stubbornly screaming. I was ripped up to my core: on the one hand, devastated at your sadness; on the other, downright ticked off that you were refusing to do what I knew you knew to do. My last ditch effort was a reset. So I changed your diaper, put some Garlic Mullen drops in your ear (because you’re just coming off of an ear infection), and laid you back down. You didn’t make a peep, you finally went to sleep.

Moments like this are so trying. It hurts my heart to hear you cry like that but it also hurts yours and my physical beings to be so severely sleep deprived. Sleep has to win Penny. And I pray so hard that, through this sleep teaching process, that we both are only the better for it. That you still smile and laugh so much. And that you also learn to love your crib and sleep. That our bond is untainted.

I love you Penny.

Now, please sleep.

Love,

Mommy