Written October 19, 2013 at 16 weeks pregnant
They don’t tell you how hard it is to keep the biggest secret of your life!
One, telling the world you are engaged is close to, but not as big as telling the world you are pregnant with your first child. Let me explain, when we were engaged we were so excited to tell the world that we were so in love that we wanted to commit the rest of our lives together. Now, four years later, our love is worlds different and worlds stronger, more passionate, and more lovely than the day we announced we were engaged. So, with our new inseparable love and a baby on the way that we get to love and grow together I have found my level of excitement about our new adventure exponentially higher. Then, unlike being able to immediately announce your engaged, you are strongly encouraged by this unwritten rule to withhold your exciting news until after your first trimester is complete. That’s three months of big secrecy folks!
Two, you miss out on the camaraderie. The first trimester is tough because I am dead tired, ridiculously hungry, and slightly queasy ALL THE TIME, my boobs ache as if they are being weighed down by rocks, and I have no one but my hubby to talk to about it – and though sympathetic and understanding he’s still a dude. I find myself wanting people to ask me the questions I like to ask pregnant friends. How have you been feeling? Were you surprised? What kind of birth are you going to have? Are you going to find out if it’s a boy or a girl?
Three, with Josh gone through the majority of this first trimester, having some help now would be huge… but since I have to keep quiet there is no such luck on that front! For example, having my own personal dinner chef now would mean the world of a difference! I’m so starving so suddenly that I can only manage to pile in whatever I can find immediately – this also means my choices aren’t as healthy as they could be if I had time to put something together. And though I’m not showing, my movements are already limited beyond what the average Kaia did; I can’t lift things lift heavy things off the ground because my uterus cramps up in protest. Where is my man when I need him right? 😉
But now, if this post is up, I am able to share my news with the whole world and now have a network of friends and family to be excited with me and help me 🙂
Musings of a Musician's Wife 
Praying you will feel better. Thank you for being patient to allow your hubby to perform. Their ministry is awesome and much appreciated. Hope you can find a MOPS group somewhere and some girl/mom support to get you through this. It’s all worth it in the end. Good luck