Today I found myself on my kitchen floor hugging my toddler like she was my anchor.
Moving backwards. It was the dinner I couldn’t envision because my dishwasher was broken, my dishes were clean and strewn across the counter tops and piled in the sink, and the undercarriage of the sink strewn across the floor. It was the stroller that broke and then broke again with three toddlers in it. It was the screaming baby I wore protesting my efforts to put the wheels back on the stroller. It was the stroller breaking and the baby screaming at my efforts three more times. It was trying to finish painting my office while all the children (or at least most of them) slept so I could put a bow on the project and stamp it “FINISHED” after several weeks of having it torn apart. It was my dishwasher being officially flagged as “busted” and slated for repair in a couple of days. It was the jackhammering in the basement bathroom. It was that the basement bathroom is under construction thus labeling the entire basement “unfit for small children.” It was the reworking the routine and sleeping arrangements to work around the basement bathroom project.
Moving forwards. I am blessed after many months, years rather, of saving to remodel the bathroom. I am blessed to own and operate a dishwasher on a daily basis. Heck, I’m blessed to have running water on an all day, every day basis. I am blessed to have food in our pantry and fridge. I am blessed to have several amazing little girls in my house to love and be loved by every day all while contributing to our family income while doing so. I am blessed enough to have a two year old girl that loves me very much and holds me when I need it. I am blessed with a beautiful and joyful (though still slightly pneumonia stricken) baby. I am blessed with a husband who is home, no longer on the road, and willing. I am blessed to have a bathtub and be given the gift of cleanliness (since our shower has been not only been out of order but nonexistent for a week so far). I am blessed to find myself alone in that bath tub and enveloped in essential oils that still the explosion of stress within me. And, most of all, I am blessed by the love of the Father and even in my yuck He doesn’t stop seeking to tap me on the shoulder to turn me around and notice all the wonderful things He’s given me.
Because of all the routine disrupting action in the house I found it incredible that it was also because of that disruptive environment that caused me to seek out the cleanliness of a bath and, in turn, find the Lords peace wrap around me and His voice speak the list I just laid out before you. God is so good. He is so full of love and always looking to spend time with us. In this moment I am thankful for the disruption in our home and that it plunged me into some quality time with my Daddy.